zhwark n Placeholder word for a poorly chosen coinage, standing in temporarily until a more appropriate expression comes along. If ever. For example, in the absence of 'trickle down', zhwark would surely be preferable to Laffer Curve.  In the '50s, computers were becoming small
enough to be moved out of the "computer room" into
offices and assigned to individuals. Even so, a
typical computer in those days was the size of a large desk
and expensive. Such a machine
was the IBM
1620, and it was the earliest workstation.To be sure, every computer was used for only the most serious matters. Hence 'work'. And being immobile, they were -- well, stationary. Hence 'station'.From a user's perspective, workstation has always seemed impolite to me. Intimidating, in fact. ("Get back to your station, damn it, and do your work!") However, I was never able to think of a more pleasing expression. In such situations, it is tempting to use a nonsensical word like... bazinga, dealie, dinglehopper, dingus, dohickey, dojigger, doodad, doofer, doohickey, doojigger, doovalacky, foobar, frammis, frobnitz, gadget, geegaw, gimmick, gizmo, gubbins, hickey, hodad, jigger, jobby, kajigger, oojamaflip, thingamabob, thingamajig, thingo, thingummy, thingy, thing, whatchamacallit, whatchamahoozie, whatdoyoucallit, whatnot, whatsis, whatsitsname, whatsit, whiff-whaff, whosit, widgetInstead, for discussions with colleagues, I could be heard using a word of my own invention, "For market acceptance of the technology, any moniker -- zhwark, say -- would be more conducive than workstation."
Have you not
occasionally wondered about the value of
commercial names for products and
technologies, enterprises and
institutions? Just their names.
Here is a recent list of Top 100 Brands in the World... The people at Adweek use several business criteria in the ranking of companies listed above, not merely the values of brand names for their respective products. Apple is in #1 position. There was a time when I thought that for branding a computer, Zhwark would be a whole lot more acceptable than the name of a fruit.Try to imagine the efforts that go into creating brand names for products. Without exception, car brands by the thousands have been selected to instill pride in vehicle owners worldwide. (Oh, well, there may be a few exceptions: Adler, Buckle, Butz, Cudell, Diar, Edsel, Elfin, Fudi, Gergel, Lupo, Thing, Troller, Unic, Zotye). One observes that Bavarian Motor Works, Ford, Honda, Mercedes-Benz, Nissan, and Toyota are in the top 100, but Chrysler is not. Hey, something about the word dodge makes me cringe... dodge v.i. Origin in 1560s, with evolution of its sense obscure: "to move to and fro" especially in an effort to avoid something; common from the 18th century in figurative sense: "to swindle, to play shifting tricks."Maybe that explains why I will not even take a test-drive in a Dodge. Heck, having so many other names to choose from, I might be heard to say, "I'd rather buy a Zhwark." Also conspicuously absent are Boeing and Lockheed Martin on that prestigious list. In early days of air-travel,few people had yet dared to take their first flight. A name like Constellation for an airliner probably instilled confidence. Later Comet signified speed. Perhaps Electra connotes sophistication. You get the idea.Then, along comes Airbus. Whoa! Riding a bus in the sky? So much for speed and sophistication. Friends and family have heard me ask, "Wouldn't you prefer to board a Zhwark for your next intercontinental trip?" After 60 years of numerical branding in the form of 7X7, Boeing finally seems to be getting the idea: Dreamliner. It can be argued that advances in software have
facilitated the wonders in our present world.
One product, if I may be permitted to say so, started
out with a perfect name: Number 92 Twitter.
Just think, more than 300 million users, and
each user can instantly deliver
-- "tweet"
like the sound of a bird -- messages to
their followers. Theoretically up
to 300 million followers worldwide!
Each tweet can be...
No surprise that
prominent persons have become users,
along with political leaders. Twitter
has shown itself to be a wonderful way for a president,
say, to communicate with a nation ("tweeting" is a
high-tech form of the "fireside
chat"), to inspire constituents, to
instruct subordinates, to
influence policy makers, to issue
proclamations, to command armed
forces... Whoa!
No president would ever go that far. If he or she does, then some name other than Twitter would be more appropriate. Send your ideas here. In the meantime, let's use zhwark. |